Love Again
by cartuneslover17
Summary: Remember the episode "Homer and Lisa Exchange Crosswords"? Well, two minor people who were dumped by their supposed soulmates find each other...and all heck breaks loose!
1. Lost Love and Found

_**After watching "Homer and Lisa Exchange Crosswords" for the 15th time, I couldn't help but feel sorry for Doreen and that other guy who got dumped by that alcoholic hypocrite known as Ms. Hoover. As an enthusiast for Simpsons romance, it's my duty that every character, major or minor, deserves love, even these two. **_

**_Man, Hoover rejected the one man who was blind enough to actually ask her to marry him. Looks like Edna ain't the only one who'll die alone. :P_**

"Now this next piece of news won't seem so bad," Homer Simpson told Doreen Maddison as they sat between a bar table.

"Is there something I should know about?" Doreen asked as she looked around the bar for her boyfriend whom she had no idea was

hiding behind the bar tender's table, awaiting the results of his announcing break-up.

Homer took a deep breath as he took her hands in his. "Well, there comes a time when two people who get to know one another and

start dating...suddenly, it seems like you feel like you hardly know the person anymore. And that's what Lenny finds in your

relationship."

"What?" Doreen asked softly, her heart twisting like a pretzel.

"Doreen," Homer began, "it's not that Lenny doesn't like you...he just thinks you could do so much better. I mean, SO much better."

Doreen pondered for a moment, reflecting on her previous dates with Lenny. Sure he was sweet, funny, and really nice...but it was

obvious there was no spark between them. He might as well have Carl in his life...like that hasn't already happened.

"You're right," Doreen said, standing up, "I can do better. His black friend can have him if he wants to."

"Excellent," Homer encouraged, "now you know your life is so much more meaningful without a guy like Lenny involved."

"Thanks for your help!" She told him as she dashed out the door.

"Way to go, Homer!" Lenny exclaimed as he jumped out from under the table. "But did you have to tell her I'm not worth it and

assume I was gay? I mean, it's bad enough your wife thinks so!"

"Hey, it's better than telling her how attractive you really are," Homer retorted.

Charlie Darwin could only watch in painful sadness as the message proposal on the giant screen slowly exploded and revealed the

words, _'she wants to see other people'_. He could only stare at the screen, his heart shattering while Ms. Hoover took her hand away

from his delicate hold. Homer rushed to his side and comforted him.

It took Charles a few moments to regain reality. He looked over at Ms. Hoover, the woman he thought he was madly in love with, with

saddened eyes.

"But why?" He asked weakly.

Hoover sighed as she shook his head. "Don't take this the wrong way," she told him, "but you are a total dork." And with that, she

stood up from her seat and just left him to be comforted by Homer.

"Eliza, I-" Charles began, but was cut off by Homer.

"Forget about her," Homer told him, "she drinks more whiskey than Barney Gumble could in a week."

"But..." Charles's voice trailed off as he lowered his head, "it felt like she was the one."

"Hey, come on," Homer assured him, "you don't need her. I mean, you're snappily dressed, you still got hair, plus you work at...um,

where do you work at?"

"Springfield University," Charles answered, his sadness slowly seeping out.

"Springfield University?" Homer gasped. "Man, why spend your big bucks for someone like her?"

"Because I thought she was a woman I could love and start a family with," he answered incredulously.

"Oh, trust me," Homer told him, "you do not want her to be the mother of your kids. She can hardly teach a class, what makes you

think she can raise a family?"

It took Charles a few moments to let all this sink in. Suddenly, it dawned on him that he almost made a terrrible, life-changing mistake.

He stood up and shook his hands. "I can't thank you enough!" Charles told him. "Maybe the right woman for me is still out there!" And

with that, he walked off in the opposite direction Ms. Hoover had gone.

"I'd rather have donuts as a thank-you, if you don't mind!" Homer hollered to him.

It had been a week since the breakup, and Doreen was doing fine with her life; her heart still ached, though. Working as a nurse,

tending to Dr. Hibbert's orders and playing with sick, but happy, children, the breakup was still plagued in her mind as well as deep

within her heart.

She had came over to Homer Simpson's house to bring him a gift of thanks for help in making the aftermath of the break-up seem

easy. She was surprised to find that Homer had stopped doing the breakup business and was now assisting his children in selling

popular lemonade.

The same following day, Charles had came to the house shortly after Doreen left. He decided to give Homer a box of donuts as a gift

for helping him go through the painful breakup...which was still aching him badly. As a former teacher of Springfield Elementary, he

should've known better than to date Elizabth Hoover.

To ask Edna Krabappel...certainly not.

Charles sighed as he entered the National Museum of History. As a fan of the wonders of evolution as well as a teacher of it, Charles

loved to talk about it and express his opinions of it, which must have been a reason to why Ms. Hoover had dumped him...

Charles heart still ached after what had happened that crucial day. Hoover's last words to him, and they were far from pity. It was

more of an insult, a discouragement toward him.

But being at the museum, it took his mind off her and back to basics on the wonders of scientific history. Grabbing a nearby brochure,

he observed to see where the new hall of possible biblical eras was. He was so engrossed in the brochure, he had no idea where he

was going.

"Oof!" he exclaimed as his harm bumped into another one.

"Sorry," said the woman.

"No, no," he told her as he brushed himself. He looked up to see who he had bumped into...his heart stopped.

"Um, sir?" The woman asked carefully as he looked at her. "Are you alright?"

"Wha-?" Charles shook his head. "Forgive me, miss. I'm Charles. What's your name?"

"Doreen," the woman replied.

"Nice to meet you," Charles said as he extended his hand to her.

_**Go to my Deviantart page, cartuneslover16, to see more Simpsons couples such as this one. :)**_


	2. Meant to Be

_**Please read and review!  
_**_

It felt like a total twist of fate for both Charlie and Doreen as they got to know one another during their tour around the museum. It felt like each was given a second chance at life with, hopefully, better results. The tour was quite a liberating experience for the both of them.

But they mostly paid their attention to each other rather than the exhibits.

It was with that shrill of hope that Charlie got up the nerve to do what he thought he'd never do for a long time after his horrible breakup with Ms. Hoover.

"Um, would you care to have dinner with me tonight?" He asked nervously.

There. He said it. If she said no, he would be heading straight to Moe's.

Doreen's eyes widened at the offer. It was as if fate was giving her the chance she had hoped for ever since her breakup. She had just met Charlie yet somehow she felt a sort of connection.

And Charlie was making it click.

"I'd love to," she exclaimed, a little more excited than she wanted to show.

She said yes! Dear God, Charlie was going to have to play his cards right if he wanted things to go smoothly. Unlike Ms. Hoover, Doreen seemed one to actually take interest in what he loved.

It could work...

"How about Luigi's?" He said excitedly, still keeping his posture.

"Oh, I love that place!" She replied. "It sure beats Sea Captain's place!"

"Trust me," Charlie chuckled, "I almost made a lawsuit because my food was squirting ink at me."

Night had arrived, and so had Charlie and Doreen as they parked right beside the fancy, Italian restaurant. Entering, they were soon greeted by the owner himself.

"Ah, Charlie!" Luigi greeted in his thickest Italian accent as he shook hands with the man. He looked over at Doreen beside him. "And Doreen!" He took her hand and kissed it. "What a surprise, eh? Come in! Come in! Many a-tables are open!"

"When was the last time you came here?" Doreen asked Charlie as they sat at their table.

"Um, a few days ago," Charlie replied nervously.

"Allow Luigi to a-bring the a-salad and breadsticks! Complementary of my a-restaurant!" He said, twirling his mustache. He looked over at Charlie. "Finally going back on the a-dating route, no?" He looked over at Doreen. "She is much more beautiful than that malicious, how you say, drunkie, yes?" And with that, he left them to themselves.

"You've just dated recently?" Doreen asked him finally.

Charlie played with his hands. "Well, yes," he replied nervously, "A Ms. Hoover."

"Wait a minute," Doreen cut in, "Elizabeth Hoover? Second grade teacher at Springfield Elementary?"

"Yeah," Charlie said. "You know her?" He noticed fire was blazing in her eyes. But it wasn't the kind of fire that hinted passion.

It the fire of fury.

"She's a horrible teacher!" Doreen exclaimed without thinking. "I just aided one of her students in the hospital last week due to a mishap at a scissors factory."

"Oh, yeah," Charles remembered, "Ralph Wiggum; poor kid." He smiled at her. "I thank you for stitching him up."

"It's no problem," Doreen said, blushing, "that's what nurses do. Hey, how do you know Hoover and Ralph so well? I mean, you work at the local university."

Charles sighed. "I was a teacher at the school...before budget cuts had me laid off."

Doreen gasped. "Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that." Damn the economy...damn hopeless schooling. Why couldn't Hoover have gotten laid off instead? Charlie certainly cared for his students more than she could ever be...

Charlie shook it aside. "Don't worry about it. I work at a better, and more reliable, department. And the students actually pay attention to me."

"That's wonderful," she said. She looked at him curiously. "So...what happened to your relationship with Hoover?" She didn't mean to pry, but someone who found interest in Hoover? She needed to know.

Charlie bit his lip. "Well...she thought I was a total dork," he said finally, "she hired this Homer Simpson guy to break the news 'gently' to me that she didn't want to date me anymore...and right after I just proposed to her."

Recalling those events hurt his heart...he remembered trying not to break down when he returned the ring.

"She rejected your proposal because of your high intellect?" Doreen asked, shocked.

Charlie nodded. "Blew me off like the meteor that got rid of the dinosaurs." He chuckled lightly at his scientific joke.

"Ouch," Doreen cringed, "and wait, did you say Homer Simpson? Former breakup specialist?"

"Yeah," he replied, "you know him?"

"Know him?" Doreen exclaimed. "He had recently told me that my boyfriend, Lenny, wanted to break up with me."

"Wow," Charlie exclaimed, "you too? How did you take it?"

Doreen sighed. "At first, I was completely hurt by it...but now I know I can do SO much better. And..." she fiddled with her thumbs playfully, not looking directly at Charlie. "...I believe I did."

Charlie blushed at her confession...his heart felt like it wanted to beat right out of his chest. Never had Hoover been this nice, or even this sentimental...

"I'm a-back!" Luigi sang as he placed salad and breadsticks before them. He handed them their menus. "May I suggest the a-chicken linguini? Unfortunately, the a-turkey linguini, we will be postponing from our a-menu."

A loud crash was heard in the kitchen.

"You a-stupid bird!" They heard one of the chefs cry out. "I will take your a-head and feed it as an appetizer!"

Dinner was great for the both of them as they exchanged conversations, talking about their recent not-so-perfect dates and their past experiences. It felt good to talk about it; it was like counseling. Not Springfield Elementary counseling...

Better.

It was late when Charlie drove Doreen home to her apartment. Her room being on the top floor, Charles offered to walk her there.

As soon as they arrived at her door, Charlie fiddled with his tie, wondering if he should take another step toward what he had been hoping for all night.

"I really enjoyed tonight," he said finally.

"I did as well," Doreen said, smiling, as she searched her purse for her keys.

"Doreen," Charlie began finally.

"Yes?" Doreen asked hopefully. Her fingers tightening on her keys.

"I was wondering if...if you weren't busy tomorrow, or maybe the day after that," he told her,"I mean...I've met many women in my life..." he gave a sheepish grin, "...but none of them could be more amazing than you."

Doreen's heart flipped at his confession. "Want to know something?" She told him softly. "I feel the exact same way."

And with that, they exchange a passionate, but short, kiss. Once they had finished, looking into each other's eyes, they knew that breaking up with their ex's had been the best thing to happen to them.

"And by the way," she told him playfully, "I'm free the whole week. So I'm all yours until Tuesday."

"Great," Charlie chuckled, feeling giddy.

Doreen giggled as she bid him goodnight and went inside her room. Charlie just stood there, taking in what had just happened.

Then he went downstairs to his car, skipping and singing a merry tune.


	3. Winning Big

_**Please read and review!  
_**_

"Smithers!" Barked the aging man known as Mr. Burns as he sat at his office desk and idly played with his pendulum.

"Yes, sir?" Asked Mr. Smithers as he entered the office, a pen and clipboard in hand.

"Contact the media," the old man ordered, "I'm feeling a bit...generous."

"Generous?" Mr. Smithers asked in surprise. "How so?"

"You remember how many people are ripped off today in America for buying lotto tickets in hopes of winning that jackpot?"

"Um, yes."

"Well," Mr. Burns smiled evilly, "I plan to play with the town itself and let their hopes up...just enough to sink down."

"How much are you willing to give, sir?"

"Oh, I don't know," Mr. Burns said in a modest tone, "I'm a very rich man. I guess a billion dollars is a fine amount to waste on these peasants."

"As you wish, sir," Mr. Smithers said as he exited his office.

Mr. Burns looked out the window of fair Springfield itself. "I wonder what bumbling boob could ever win a lotto...especially from me?"  
_

"Charles! I feel like I'm doing all the pedalling!" Doreen laughed as they rode on a tandem bike through the park.

"Hi, Mr. Darwin!" Bart and Lisa Simpson greeted. They were standing behind a stand and selling lemonade.

"Oh, look, a couple of students from the school," Charles said as he and Doreen stopped and parked their bike beside a tree.

"Lemonade?" Bart asked suavely as he offered them a cup. "Only a buck."

"Hey, aren't you Homer's kids?" Charles asked as he handed the boy some money.

"Yeah," Lisa responded, "why do you ask?"

"D'oh!" Cried a voice. Everyone turned to see the large man himself struggling with a huge bag of sugar as he wobbled over to the kids. He threw it beside the stand. "There! Here's your sugar!" He panted from exhaustion. He took one look at Doreen and Charles and smiled. "Hey, I remember you guys!"

"Hello, Homer," Doreen chuckled.

"Man, I remember I told you guys you'd do so much better without your old mates," Homer said, "I was actually right."

"These two were part of your breakup schedule?" Lisa asked incredulously.

"If it weren't for your father," Charles told her, "I would have never met a more perfect woman." He placed an arm around Doreen.

"Told you you'd find someone better than Hoover," Homer told him slyly.

"Ew, Hoover?" Bart cringed. "What more if you dated Krabbapel?"

"This Kent Brockman with news of the hour," said a voice.

Everyone turned to see the reporter known as Kent Brockman with a camera shoved in his of as they stood right beside where the lemonade stand was.

"Our lemonade can't be that popular!" Homer cried in disbelief.

"It seems that old man Burns has become the town's leading donor as he has earlier announced a lottery...for one billion dollars," he continued as he walked over to the lemonade stand, "one please." He placed a dollar in front of Bart and Lisa and they gave him a cup. Taking a quick sip, "in later news...lemonade has never been sweeter. Try cooling yourself off today with-"

"Bart and Lisa's home-style lemonade!" Bart intervened as he pointed to their sign.

"Burns is giving away a billion dollars?" Homer cried. "W-where do I get the tickets?"

"Why, at your local super market," Kent explained, "like the Kwik-E-Mart."

"Billionaire lifestyle, here I come!" Homer shouted out as he raced down the park to get to the local Kwik-E-Mart store.

The town was bustling with ticket buyers as they crowded inside the Kwik-E-Mart in hopes of becomingthe next richest man or woman. Apu was more than happy to have to many people push and shove into his store; he was making so much money because of it.

"Thank you, come again," he said repeatedly as he gave away tickets and received money, "thank you, come again...thank you, come again...thank you, come again..." He took a few moments to breath. "Manjula, dear?" He struggled to say as he looked over at his wife. "Could you please continue the tiring monologue for me?"

Doreen and Charles exited the store and squeezed through other people as they held on tight to their purchased lottery tickets.

"Oh, I hope one of us wins," Doreen squealed as they entered inside Charles's home and sat on his couch, "I mean, just think about it! The next richest person in town, Burns will have no choice but to respect him or her, just like he does to McBain and Chuck Norris!"

"And hopefully, the next person doesn't abuse the power they'll soon get," Charles chuckled as he placed an arm around her as he switched on the television.

"Greetings, peasants," Mr. Burns said as his aging appearance came on screen, making seem even more creepy than usual. Behind him was a massive tube filled with tickets. Beside him was Mr. Smithers, holding the lever to start the machine. "Hope you all have your hopes up for your soon-to-be rich lives...because I know I don't!" He cackled evilly.

"That ass," Doreen muttered bitterly as they watched.

"Inside this machine holds an exact copy of every ticket that was given away," Mr. Burns motioned to the machine, "Smithers will let it turn for a few minutes..." he nodded to his assistant and Mr. Smithers pulled the lever. The machine began to turn. "...and that's when I say...stop." And with that the machine stopped and Mr. Burns reached an old hand into the pile. "And the winning numbers are...," he began, "...2, 21, 18, 14, 19, 19, 21, 3, 11, and...19." He faced the screen and smiled evily. "Hope you're not to disappointed you didn't win."

"Ah, damn," Doreen exclaimed as she tossed her ticket away, "last number got my off."

"Oh, dear, God..." Charles gasped as he looked at his ticket and quickly stood up.

"Chalres, what is it?" Doreen asked.

"Doreen..." he said, almost insanely, "...I won! I won the million dollars!"

"No way!" She cried as she stood up and hugged him. "That's wonderful! You're rich!"

"No, Doreen..." he said softly as he looked at her lovingly, "we're rich."

"What?" Doreen asked in pure shock.

"Doreen," he began nervously, "I know we've only been dating for a month, but...looking at you, just spending time with you...it really feels like you're the one." He took her hands. "Would you...would you move in with me?"

Doreen blinked in surprise at the offer. Then she burst into tears as she hugged him even tighter. "Yes, I'll do it."

"I love you, Doreen," he told her as he hugged her close.

"Me, too," Doreen sighed.

Mr. Burns was in pure disbelief when Charles and Doreen rushed to his office and told him Charles had won the billion dollars. Mr. Burns had no choice but to give them the money; it was either that or a full lawsuit that none of his high-paying lawyers could beat. Still, like he said before, a billion dollars was nothing to him.

A few days after receiving the money, Doreen had moved into Charles's house. Though they were now one of the richest people in Springfield, and the media kept interviewing them about it, they still did their jobs. Doreen still worked as a nurse while Charles still worked as a college professor.

They invested some of the money, and used another portion of it for other purposes. Charles, however, usually spent huge sums of it to buy romantic gifts for Doreen.

"Oh, Charles!" Doreen laughed as Charles showed her a pair of diamond earrings he had bought at local jewelry. "I already love you! You don't have to show you love me by buying me all these gifts! When will you stop spoiling me?"

"But you deserve so much!" Charles chuckled. "By the way, I got us reservations at the restaurant...in Waverly Hills! Isn't that exciting?"

"Oh, Charles," Doreen chuckled as she placed her hands on his shoulders, "enough about me...what do you plan to do for yourself?" She gave him a kiss on the cheek.

Charles smiled brightly. "Well," he began as he took out a couple of blueprints, "ever since I was in college, I always dreamed of having my own theme park...one that displays all about evolution, but still fun and exciting at the same time that even serious, religious people will enjoy!"

"A theme park?" Doreen asked. "That would be a wonderful idea! I mean, with the money we have, it'll be no problem!"

"You think it'll work?" Charles asked hopefully.

Doreen kissed him. "Like our relationship, it will definitely work. It might even upstage Krustyland!"

It almost felt like it was all planned out before hand. Seven months later of quick planning and the finest builders hired in the country, Evolved Kingdom was made.

"I pronounce Evolved Kingdom..." Mayor Quimby began as he stood beside Charles and Doreen as they held the scissors to the opening ribbon, "...officially open."

The ribbon was cut, and the town itself entered the amusement park.

"What the hell?" Krusty the Clown cried as he entered. "Less people are coming into my theme park for this crap? Of all the-hey, a dinosaur egg-throwing!" His anger soon diminished as he joined in the fun.

"Hmm, maybe giving away my billion dollars wasn't such a bad idea, after all," Mr. Burns said as he and Mr. Smithers walked through the theme park, "but that doesn't change me one bit!"

"This place is amazing!" Lisa exclaimed to Doreen and Charles. "Even Ned Flanders is enjoying it!" She pointed to Ned and his sons as they stood beside a fun mirror.

"Well, the cavemen never existed in the Bible," Ned proclaimed as he viewed himself in the mirror, "but dong-diggity does looking like one seem fun!"

"Hey, Doreen," said a voice. Doreen turned.

It was Lenny.

"Oh," she said, "hi, Lenny."

"Listen, Doreen," he shrugged, "I know we're not dating anymore and all. But I'd like to say congrats to you and Charles for, you know, hitting it off and all that. Can we still be friends?"

Doreen smiled. "Of course."

Lenny smiled at her. "Well, I got to scat. Carl and I are going to try the new Jurassic Park ride you built." And with that he walked away.

"He seems like a cool guy," Charles said as he watched him walk away.

"Yeah," Doreen said as she placed a hand on his back, "but he's just not my guy."

Charles chuckled as he held her close.

Unknowist to them, a certain woman in a pink skirt was given them a deep glare from afar. She drank heavily a bottle of beer before walking away.  
_

_**The lotto numbers Burns announces stand for a message. ;)**_


	4. And Then There Were Three

**__****Well, last chapter. And there is a VERY special character who appears here. ;)**

**_Please read and review!  
__**  
"I'm sorry I can't be with you at your former school to donate, honey," Doreen told Charlieas she placed on her nurse's hat. "Dr. Hibbert called me at last minute."

"Don't worry, Dory," Charlie assured her, "look at it this way. We're both helping out kids today."

Doreen gave him a quick kiss before grabbing her purse and keys. "Bye. Love you."

"Love you, too," Charlie called as she walked out the door.

Springfield Elementary...

Charlie hadn't been to the school in such a long time, yet the kids and teachers still remembered was greeted with hugs and cheers as the kids came over to him, almost placing him in a dog pile. The teachers were happy to see him, especially Principal Skinner.

"Charlie, it is so good to have you with us today," he told him as he showed him inside the auditorium.

"Just because I don't work here anymore, doesn't mean I shouldn't visit," Charlie chuckled.

"Well, we're glad to have you here, anyway," the principal told him, "and we are very humbled by your wonderful donation."

"Well, seeing as school budgets are becoming a bit out of hand, I thought it would be best to make things a little easier," Charlie told him, "I'd like to donate maybe fifty grand."

"Fifty grand?" Principal Skinner gasped. "That's more than I would have anticipated." He hugged him. "Thank you so much, Charlie! Now I won't have to let Willie go!"

"Willie heard," the groundskeeper said as he passed them, buffering the floors, "Willie don't care."

Charlie stood at the podium as Principal Skinner continued on with his monologue. He stood there proudly, knowing he would be helping a lot of kids pay more attention in school, as well as encourage them to go after their career of choice just as he had.

"I now bring you to billionaire and former teacher, Mr. Charlie Darwin," Principal Skinner announced as he motioned to Charles himself.

"Well," he began, "being a teacher here for over a year and a half, I, too, have learned a thing or two in life. What kids need in life, that dreams can become reality...that there's always another chance at love."

An echo of whispers slid through the audience of kids at Charlie's last statement.

"Yes, I know," Charlie said, nodding, "some of you may be a little too young to understand the third one, but let me tell you this: it's the last thing on the list that changes your life for the better." He looked over at Principal Skinner. "And it is my honor to donate fifty grand to the school's name." And with that, he presented Principal Skinner with a check.

The audience cheered in joy at the wonderful donation that would help their school in every way possible.

"A small check?" Bart exclaimed. "Why can't he give Skin-rash one of those gameshow checks you see on TV?"

As Charlie allowed Principal Skinner to bask in his glory and have the audience erupt in cheers, he was greeted by a familiar voice.

"Hey, there, dork."

Charlie turned around to see Ms. Hoover walk toward him. She wasn't wearing her usual staff clothes. She was in a tight pink dress; in her mouth was a cigarette. Though she was quite an alluring sight, the word 'slut' couldn't escape Charlie's mind.

"Elizabeth," Charlie said in surprise, "haven't see you since the breakup."

Ms. Hoover chuckled. "Well, seeing what kind of a man you really are, I just couldn't bare to stay away." She wanted to place her hands on his chest, but he stepped back.

"Eliza, what are you doing?" Charlie demanded, startled by her actions.

"Seeing if you're trying to win me back," she told him seductively, "I mean, honestly, you're dating that chestless medical nanny? Surely you could've done better."

"What's Ms. Hoover doing?" Lisa asked her brother as they turned their attention away from Principal Skinner's monologue and focused on the conversation between Ms. Hoover and Charlie.

"Dude, I think she's trying to sex him up or something!" Bart exclaimed.

"Haha!" Nelson laughed as he pointed at Charlie. "He's a dead man!"

"What do you want, Eliza?" Charlie demanded, not letting her seductive charm get through him.

"Why, you, silly," Ms. Hoover laughed, "what else could I possibly want?" She was about to caress his face, when he grabbed her hand and pushed it away.

Principal Skinner turned from the audience to see what the commotion was.

"I think I know exactly what you're after," Charlie said as he glared at her, "you're after my money. And you're trying to win me over just so you can get to it."

"Oh, come on!" Ms. Hoover screamed, throwing her hands in the air, dropping her charm and looking at him angrily. "I'm doing us both a favor!"

"What can I favor in you?" He demanded.

"That I'm hot as hell compared to that Jennifer Anniston wannabe you're dating!" Ms. Hoover shot back.

The audience gasped at the comeback.

"You've proposed to me once," she told him bitterly, "you can propose to me again."

"You proposed to her?" Principal Skinner asked.

"Worse mistake of my life," Charlie told him, causing everyone to gasp.

"What?" Ms. Hoover demanded. "You were crazy about me! You'd do anything to impress me!"

"That was before I realized just what kind of a woman you really are!" Charlie shouted, causing her to step back in surprise. The raise of his voice caused the whole audience to shudder. Charlie glared at her. "Here you are, given the chance to help children learn for the better, and yet you abuse the power by just drinking and smoking and letting your kids fail on purpose!"

"You tell her, Mr. Darwin!" Lisa hooted, not caring what she did was so unlike her.

"I mean, the way I see it," Charlie continued, "I'm probably the first and only man that would go as low as to ask you to be my wife. Because you know why? I doubt any man would marry you if you have no real heart to give!"

The audience, even Principal Skinner, gasped.

"Oh, man!" Bart laughed. "Major burn!"

"And unlike you," Charlie concluded, "Doreen has given me everything my heart truly asked for. And that what truly makes me feel like a rich man."

Silence swept upon them both as Ms. Hoover took in every word, Charlie just glared at her.

Suddenly, Bart and Lisa stood up and clapped, followed by Nelson and Milhouse. Soon, the entire audience was clapping for Charlie. Even Principal Skinner did so.

Charlie smiled at everyone, thankful that they were on his side. He looked back at Ms. Hoover, whose eyes were blazed with furry.

"You're not going to get rid me that easily," she sneered as she tossed away her cigarette and dashed off stage and out of the school, utterly humiliated.

Charlie could only smile. He couldn't wait to tell Doreen what had happened.

"She seriously tried to get you back?" Doreen asked as they sat between their dining table.

Charlie nodded as he wiped his napkin against his lips. "A hooker's outfit, cigarette, and make-up that made her look cheap," he explained.

"Wow," Doreen said, "and you defended me. You defended yourself. You even defended the school."

"Aw, Doreen," Charlie told her, "you know you're very important to me, and so are the kids at the school. Hoover was a horrible teacher; she deserved to get an eye opener."

"Well," Doreen said, smiling, "I'm just glad she left you while she could."

"Don't be too sure," Charlie told her, "for some reason, I feel like she's going to try and get me back again."

Doreen and Charlieentered Evolved Kingodm, greeted by their fellow Springfieldians.

"I love making the people happy," Doreen sighed as she shook hands with little kids.

"I love knowing that everyone, even adults, are learning more about science," Charlie told her.

"Excuse me, fellow professor," called the town's local scientist, Dr. Frink, "may I have a word with you and ask about the physics behind your genius empire?"

"Uh, sure," Charlie said. He turned to Doreen. "I'll be right back."

"Take your time, sweetie," she told him as she walked off, "I got to re-apply my make-up."

As she walked off behind a tent where no one would see her, she took out her hand mirror and began to apply lipstick.

"Hello, Doreen," said a sinister voice.

Doreen's heart stopped beating as she looked around to see Ms. Hoover stand before her, a beer in hand.

"Oh, Elizabeth," she said, her heart still,beating with fear, "um..."

"You taked away ma guy," Ms. Hoover said in a slurred voice as she stumbled toward her, "you make me loose him...and his big bucks."

"Oh, my God!" Doreen exclaimed. "You're drunk!"

"I maybe drunk," Ms. Hoover slurred as she tossed the empty beer bottle away and reached her hands toward her, "but I know who's to pay." And with that, in a horrible posture, she went after her.

Doreen screamed as she dashed away from her, scared for her life.

"Doreen?" Charliecried, cutting away from his conversation with Frink.

"Is something wrong?" The professor asked.

"Frink, get Wiggum!" He ordered as he dashed off.

"Let go off me!" Doreen cried as the drunker woman held her in a half Nelson. No matter how hard Doreen hit or scratched her, Ms. Hoover was just too drunk to feel any real pain.

"You're going to pay big time for making lose my chance at marrying one of the richest men in Springfield!" Ms. Hoover shouted.

"Eliza!" Charlie called as he stood before her. "Let go of her!"

"Marry me then!" Ms. Hoover shouted. "Marry me or the cow dies!"

"Dream on, McDrunkster!" Shouted a voice.

Ms. Hoover turned to see Bart and Lisa just as they shot her fullblast with squirt guns from one of the carnival booths. Ms. Hoover stumbled forward, letting go of Doreen.

"Oh, Doreen!" Charlie cried as he raced over to her and hugged her. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she told him, "I hope that freakin' bastard gets it!"

"This is for making first semester more miserable than all the rest!" Lisa shouted as she continued squirting Ms. Hoover.

"Why, you little-!" Ms. Hoover shouted as she opened her arms, intending to strangle her.

**_BANG!_**

Ms. Hoover suddenly fell down before Bart and Lisa.

Everyone turned to see Chief Wiggum, smoke seeping from his gun.

"Elizabeth Hoover," he said, "you're under arrest for attempting murder and threat, and for being drunk in public! Book her, boys!"

And with that, Lou and Eddie handcuffed her and dragged her away.

"Take one last look at her, kids," Chief Wiggum told Bart and Lisa as they watched her leave, "cause' she won't be in school for quite a while!"

"But...who's going to teach second grade then?" Lisa asked in concern.

"Don't worry about a thing, Lisa," Charlie assured her, "I'll hire somebody to take her place."

"Man, this really is the best place in Springfield!" Bart exclaimed. "I learn and have fun at the same time, then become part of a dangerous rescue that nearly cost my sister's life!"

"Don't think it was free," Charlie laughed as he dug into his wallet, "five hundred dollars for each of you, for saving Doreen."

"I'm going to save this for college!" Lisa exclaimed as she looked at her money.

"You know something?" Bart said as he looked at the money in his hands. "I think I'll do the same thing, too."

A week after the incident at the theme park, Ms. Hoover was sentenced to eight months to a year in prison. The substitute that was taking over for her was teaching better to Lisa's class than Ms. Hoover could ever do.

Doreen and Charlie decided to take a break from all the money and glamor as they planned a weekend getaway in the woods where they would camp.

Doreen and Charlie were taking a walk through the woods when they heard large howls and grunts. They rushed to where the sound was coming from, and what they found scared them...

A young boy fighting for his life against a pack of wolves.

"Get lost, pups!" The boy shouted as he gave one punch and kicked another.

Suddenly, one wolf ran and bit him in the arm. The boy howled in pain as he tried to shake it off.

"Oh, my God!" Doreen cried.

Charlie didn't hesitate to take out a hand-gun and shoot a few bullets in the air. The sound of gun shots scared the wolves, and they scurried off, leaving the young boy to suffer his given pain.

"Oh, God, Charlie!" Doreen cried as she rushed to aid the boy. "He's hurt really bad!"

Soon, he was brought to their campsite, where Doreen nursed and fed him canned soup.

"What's your name, boy?" Charlie asked softly.

"Donnie..." the boy replied above a whisper, "and what you guys did for me...that was totally epic."

"Where are your parents?" Doreen asked him in deep concern as she bandaged his head.

"Dead."

"Oh, dear Lord," Charlie gasped as he looked over the injured orphan.

"But I've survived the past couple of years before my parents took a dirt nap," Donnie went on, "being attacked by wolves is no different. I just have to fight to survive."

"Well, young man," Charlie told him, smiling. He glanced at Doreen, whom smiled as well. "You can stop fighting now."

A month after Donnie was rescued, he was brought to their home where he was given the life every ten-year-old received. He was soon adopted, earning the name, Donnie Darwin. He was sent to school where he was reunited with Bart. Principal Skinner was equally surprised on his return, but they soon worked it out that their earlier encounter would be kept secret and Donnie became like every other kid.

Charlie, Doreen, and Donnie all sat around a table at Luigi's, just as any family has done.

"Here is your-a spaghetti, ma'am," Luigi said as he placed a heaping plate of pasta in front of Doreen.

"About time!" Doreen laughed as she dug her fork into it.

"Careful when you chew," Charlie told her, "you might find something special."

"Wha-" Before Doreen could say anything, she felt something hard against her teeth. She groaned in pain before openning her mouth, what she found made her heart skip a beat.

It was a ring.

She looked over at Charlie and Donnie, who smiled at her. Luigi gave her the thumbs up, having been held responsible for putting it there.

"Doreen," Charlie began as he knelt down and took the ring from her, "will you marry me and let us truly become a family?"

Doreen could only cry as Charlie slid the ring into her finger.

"Yes," she managed to say as she leaned down and hugged him, "I would love to be your wife...and the mother of Donnie."

"That is so awesome," Donnie said, "...mom and dad."

To make a long story short, Doreen and Charlie got married in Evolve Kingdom. Everyone in Springfield had been invited. Even Ms. Hoover herself.

She sat at her jail cell while watching the wedding on television.

**_The End  
__**

**__****I really don't like Hoover, and I was wondering when Lisa would snap and get at her for her lousy teaching.**

**_Also, I apologize that this story's style isn't like my others. This is an OLD story, and I'm kind of lazy to add more 'oomph'. ;)_**


End file.
